I don't know how to say this.. I've been keeping it from everyone for quite some while... It's because I don't have the courage to tell anyone about it.. I'm struggling to accept it on my own..Three months ago...I felt a surging pain in my chest.. I've been coughing badly most of the time. My throat is constantly in pain. Breathing was such a torture I decided to just lie on the bed holding my breath, only breathing when necessarily. The pain was unbearable..
My mom was worried. She took me to SJMC. I told her it was nothing. As I get it all the time. Only that day it was a bit more painful than usual. Nothing serious. I'll just stop smoking for that day. She persisted. And so we went to the hospital. How at that moment I didn't realize my world would come crashing down...
Lung Cancer...yes. Already in critical state. The doctors there was nothing could be done to cure it. the only thing left was to make life more comfortable to me. The doctor, David was he name. Great person. Friendly and warm, he told me that I should spent my time with my family and those dear to me. How much more do I have left doctor? 18 months at most...
Silence in the room...I pushed back the tears and forced a smile. At least I would still get to see the EURO 2008 Finals. I hope..As my mom talked with the doctor outside the room, I cried alone on the bed.
Maybe the cause is too much smoking I don't know...I haven't stop smoking. What's the point? They say smoking kills you. I'm already dying. So why take the fun out of my life. What's left of it anyway.. I'm not being negative..I just want to make the most out of what time I have left with this world. My family, my friend...i want to spend the rest my days with them.To anyone who I have hurt in the part I ask for forgiveness. To anyone who have done me wrong I forgive you. Because, hey life is too short to stay angry. You may not know when you are going to leave this world. Well I do actually...when you know it is your time to go you start seeing everything in a new light. And you wished you could get back in time to change some things you have done.
I've been keeping this from everyone for so long. so my friens, my bros, korang sume...sorry..aku x berani nk berdepan dgn korg nk cakap benda ni...aku cuba untuk x fikir sangat pasal ni. sb kalau aku fikir aku xkan bole nk gelak2 dgn korang..aku xnak org sedih untuk aku. I don't want to be remembered during my final days as a sick and dying person...
My mom was worried. She took me to SJMC. I told her it was nothing. As I get it all the time. Only that day it was a bit more painful than usual. Nothing serious. I'll just stop smoking for that day. She persisted. And so we went to the hospital. How at that moment I didn't realize my world would come crashing down...
Lung Cancer...yes. Already in critical state. The doctors there was nothing could be done to cure it. the only thing left was to make life more comfortable to me. The doctor, David was he name. Great person. Friendly and warm, he told me that I should spent my time with my family and those dear to me. How much more do I have left doctor? 18 months at most...
Silence in the room...I pushed back the tears and forced a smile. At least I would still get to see the EURO 2008 Finals. I hope..As my mom talked with the doctor outside the room, I cried alone on the bed.
Maybe the cause is too much smoking I don't know...I haven't stop smoking. What's the point? They say smoking kills you. I'm already dying. So why take the fun out of my life. What's left of it anyway.. I'm not being negative..I just want to make the most out of what time I have left with this world. My family, my friend...i want to spend the rest my days with them.To anyone who I have hurt in the part I ask for forgiveness. To anyone who have done me wrong I forgive you. Because, hey life is too short to stay angry. You may not know when you are going to leave this world. Well I do actually...when you know it is your time to go you start seeing everything in a new light. And you wished you could get back in time to change some things you have done.
I've been keeping this from everyone for so long. so my friens, my bros, korang sume...sorry..aku x berani nk berdepan dgn korg nk cakap benda ni...aku cuba untuk x fikir sangat pasal ni. sb kalau aku fikir aku xkan bole nk gelak2 dgn korang..aku xnak org sedih untuk aku. I don't want to be remembered during my final days as a sick and dying person...
1 comment:
kau tipu kan dol?
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